something has changed ....

There was a time (not that long ago) when i had lots of time ...and i had to find ways to make use of it ,and today looks like days have shortened ... do we still have the same 24 Hrs a day which i had 3 years back ? things have changed .... life has changed ..... maybe even priorities have .... , when i had started off my career in the technology space .... some 5 years back ... I always belived that i am the one whos working the most and making all the $s for my company .... today i feel i am the one whos slogging it out and these juniors just out of college just dnt want to work ..... now is this just a perspective or a different generation a different mindset .... i dont knw ... all i knw that when i thot i slogged a lot 5 yrs back i had a lot of time to forward junk to the world ... be 24X7 online ........ write blogs .... be active on the social network ... play cricket ... play TT .... go to gym (once in a while ie) ... get into a volleyball game ... roam around the chennai beaches ... . be involved with socio political groups ... be part of change ... try to influence change and what not ... if i look down ... just the last 5 years i can see what it is ....... is it just abt getting practical with all your experiences ... with time you get your priorities right (now who knws 5 yrs down the line i might think otherwise) .... u understand yourself and your environment ....what you can do and what is beyond urself .... it is something like a couple of years back in a similar setup i was away frm India and there were those ghastly bomb blasts in the mumbai subarban train network .... I was shocked angered and wanted to change the world ... today I am again somewhere far off and i hear of bombs going off at the same Bus stops in bangalore where I had waited for my bus to e-city 100's of times ...and I just dont get that same feeling i had 2 years back ... i know nothing can change and nothing will change ... that spark ...that exuberance.... that hope .. seems to be deserting me ....Today the only passion i see ... offcourse other than cricket :) ... is my job .. my work, why has so much changed in the last year or so .... maybe its just that i am getting married .... i know its not right ... but its imminent ..... what i always feared is coming true ... once u get married have a family you ... the selflessness starts diminishing and the selfishnes begins ... i know its coming .... i knw its happening ... and i know it happens to most .... but i always thought i am diffrent ... the question i need to ask myself is ... what makes me change ... why cant i be my real self as i was B4 .... why cant i still find time to do what i always did ... why cant i still play the games i loved ...why cant i keep thinking big .... why cant i spare time for firends .... why cant i just be online as used to be before !!